5 Stages of Grief: How to Understand Feelings?

Denial is often the first way people react to loss. It’s a normal part of dealing with grief after something painful happens. When we are in denial, our minds are trying to handle really strong feelings and slowly accept what’s real.

During this time, you might feel numb or confused. You may not believe what’s happened It’s common to think things like “This can’t be real” or “They’ll come back soon.” These thoughts help us deal with the pain for a while. Some people might keep to themselves, avoid making choices, or just go through their daily routine without really feeling present.

Denial as a Coping Mechanism

Denial isn’t meant to last forever. It’s like a shield that protects us for a short time, letting us process the loss at our own speed. As we start to move past denial, the feeling we have been pushing down will start to come up. This can be hard to face.

If you think you are taking a long time to deal with this stage, don't hesitate to get help. First, force yourself to talk with the people who you trust, if it doesn't work go to a counselor. They can support you as you work through your feelings and start to heal.

Moving Forward

Remember to be patient with yourself as you deal with your loss. It takes time for denial to fade away. With support and time, you can move through this stage and begin to accept what happened. Always think your close ones are with you at this hard time.

You may feel uncomfortable but sometimes, your grief may show up as anger. At this period, you may get feelings of frustration or really mad by seeing yourself in such a situation. Let's explore some common reasons why people may experience anger during the grieving process:

• They might feel left behind by someone who died.
• They are upset about the pain of losing someone.
• They are frustrated by changes in their life.
• They feel like they have no control.
• They think the situation isn't fair.

Likewise, in this stage people get some feelings and thoughts, some of the common feelings are:

• Being easily annoyed
• Feeling worried
• Being afraid of losing control
• Wanting to get back at someone
• Questioning other people's actions
• Thinking life is unfair
• Thinking a lot about what happened

Ways to Deal with Anger

• Talk to someone you trust
• Write down your feelings
• Do some exercise (meditation)
• Be patient with yourself
• Keep in mind that the anger will get better over time

When Anger Becomes a Problem

• If it makes you do harmful things
• If it lasts for a very long time
• If it stops you from doing everyday things
• If you also feel very sad or worried all the time

Getting Help

• Talking to a therapist can help
• Joining a support group to meet others who feel the same way.

Moving Forward

Remember that it's okay and normal to feel angry when grieving. Try to find good ways to express your anger, as it can help you heal. Over time, you can learn to accept what happened and start to feel better.

Bargaining is a step between anger and acceptance. It's like holding onto a bit of hope while starting to face reality. That's why many people take this stage as a normal part of dealing with loss. It's when your mind tries to regain control by making deals or promises. You might think things like:

• If only I had done something differently, they would be still here.
• God, I'll be a better person if you bring them back.
• Maybe if I wait a bit longer, things will change

These thoughts aren't realistic, but they help you cope with tough emotions.

When Bargaining Becomes Problematic

If it's you or your loved ones reach this stage following previous stages, remember that it's okay to go through this stage. However, when you shall be here for some time then difficulty arises and you should be careful about that. If you feel that moving forward is somehow difficult, it would be helpful to discuss it with friends, family, or a counselor.

Always remember that there is no right or wrong way to grieve. So, be patient with yourself. After a while, you'll slowly start to accept what happened, even though it's sad.

Feeling really sad is a normal part of dealing with loss. Some experts, like Dr, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, say this sadness helps us face the reality of our loss. It's time to truly feel the pain of missing someone or something important to us.

When we are in this sad stage, we might feel:

• Really, really sad
• Like things will never get better
• Empty inside
• Too overwhelmed to deal with everyday life

We might think things like:

• "I don't know how to move on from this"
• "No one gets what I'm going through"
• "I just want to be alone"
• "Will I ever feel happy again"

These feelings and thoughts can make us want to stay away from friends and family. It's normal if you find it hard to do everyday stuff or hang out with friends right now. Feeling this way for a bit is okay. But, doesn't take long to recover from it, if such a thing happens take the help of a counselor or therapist.

Take these suggestions, prioritize yourself, and don't stress about it. Just bear in mind that it is normal to feel depressed when we have lost a loved one but the feeling will not last forever. People cope with grief in various methods hence use the time that you require. Accept that it takes time to transform and rely on the help of the people around you. Slowly but surely, you will start to feel better.

The final stage of grief is less hurting compared to other stages because you start to become normal by figuring out how to move forward. Though the loss may sadden you once in a while, you understand that this is what life is, nothing is permanent and you can't do anything about the changes except accept them.

When you reach this stage, you learn to live with the loss, even though it still hurts. You find ways to keep going with your life while remembering what you have lost. It's all about finding a new normal, where you can think about your loss without being overwhelmed by sadness all the time. During this time you might:

• Feel hopeful sometimes
• Want to spend time with friends and family again
• Start thinking about the future

What Acceptance Looks Like?

Acceptance can show up in different ways:

• You know the loss is real and can't be changed.
• You let yourself feel sad, angry, or guilty without getting over it.
• You remember what you have lost but also find new things to enjoy in life.

Getting to Acceptance

• It's not easy and takes time
• You might go back and forth between different feelings of grief.
• It's okay if it takes a long time, especially after a big loss.
• Everyone's journey is different.
• Don't pause to ask for help if you are struggling with grief. Force yourself to talk with your loved one or go to a therapist. This can make a big difference.

Until now, you have gained knowledge regarding grief and its stages. Now, the question is how is it possible to understand their feelings, maybe a friend or a relative of the grieving person, to comprehend the situation? You may be unaware of it, but here are some tips to help you to understand their feelings.

• The first thing that you will have to do is to listen. Just be there for them and that means you don't need to give them advice. The most important thing is that you are there to hear them out.
• It's not necessary to handle the loss as you want them to; they may handle such a situation differently. So, let them know it's okay to feel how they feel.
• Healing takes time, and it's not always a straight path. Thus, don't rush them towards the healing process.
• Instead of saying things like "They are in a better place," focus on what the person is going through.
• If they want to talk about memories or feelings, encourage them. But don't push if they are not ready.
• Offer to help with everyday stuff. Grief can make simple tasks feel really hard.
• Keep checking in, even after some time has passed. People often need support for longer than you might think.
• Respect when they need alone time. Because as human beings people need space to sort through their feelings.
• Lastly, if s/he can't get over the loss, gently suggest talking to a professional or joining a support group.

Whether you agree or not, simply being there for someone who is grieving can mean a lot. You don't have to have all the answers. Your presence and understanding are what matter most. So, show kindness and love, and be there for them in their hard times.